Cassiopeia Wise-Owl Chapter ten

To Cass,

How are you finding school? We are all so proud of you and can't wait for your return. The twins have grown up beautifully, in fact there is a photo enclosed of them...

Can you tell who is who? Neither can I most of the time, luckily the sock thing still works as you can imagine getting them on Saturn's socks for school is a nightmare! We are missing you so much, I can't wait to see you again. I can't wait to see your diploma!

Miss you, love you loads from;

Mars, Venus, Skye, Saturn and Jupiter

xxxxxxxx

It took a lot of hard work and teary phone calls bake home but I finally did it! I was elated when I got that diploma in my hand, I had finally achieved something and done well at school. I called Mars as soon as I could and book a taxi to take me home, I couldn't wait to see my kids it had been too long.

When the taxi got to our block of flats I started crying, my children were standing waiting for me and they had all grown up so much! Venus and Skye were teenagers now, my twins were children. Mars wasn't anywhere to be seen, so I guessed he was making me something to eat as I told how bad the food was there.

After I got something to eat, changed and put the twins to bed I sat down to watch a movie with the teens, we need to catch up.

"So Venus how you finding high school?"

"Good, I made a few friends and my grades are OK"

"What about you Skye?"

"I am the sports star at school!"

I laughed, I was glad Venus wasn't a shy any more and Skye had found an interest in sport.

I soon got myself a job at the high school and that meant getting up even earlier on Monday. As I collected the rest of my stuff I noticed a sticky note in Mars' handwriting, I looked over at him. He was still sound asleep after a late shift. I read it:-

Now your a teacher you need a good car, look in garage to the right xxx.

I couldn't believe my eyes when I saw the car in the garage. I don't know how he could of afforded it but I am so glad he did. New job and a new car.

The twins were taking the bus to their school, so I gave the teens a lift to high school.

"Your not going to be embarrassed that your mother is working at your school?"

"No"

I knew that were going to be a bit embarrassed, hey I would be!

So far teaching was good as long as I had a hot cup of coffee and a magazine to read I was happy. The students were good and so far I hadn't had to discipline any one.

But, in my fourth class I had to run out. I felt so sick I had to race out and puke my guts out in a trash can, not pleasant at all! One of the other teachers saw me and said they would look after my class.

I had to go and lay down on one of the benches. What is wrong with me?

Cassiopeia Wise-Owl Chapter nine

                                                            (sorry for the delay for this post)

Despite Mars' efforts for another child, I told him no. I was happy with my four and now I had a school run and toddlers to handle! Mars has been working over time so I am on my own a lot at night, which means waking up at seven was hard after a night of crying.

By some miracle I got everyone fed and dressed and at daycare and school on time. Venus got embarrassed that I kept taking pictures of her in her uniform, she looks so smart though!

I watched her go into school, I knew she would be fine. I then went home and got on with the housework that I have been neglecting for a while. I had also got a part time job at the local coffee shop and bar, so that also occupied my time.

When I got home Mars told me that Venus went straight to her room and won't come up for dinner. I went down stairs to see how she was, I could see she was crying.

"Venus, honey what's wrong?"

"I hate school I made no friends"

"Well did you talk to anyone?"

"No"

I sighed and ran a hand through her locks of peach hair, man I miss Pi. I saw him in her with whatever she did, he also found it hard to make friends.

"Tomorrow try talking to people, now come on. Let's go have some dinner and tonight I'll read you a story, you chose whatever book you want"

So after dinner I kept my word and went down to read to her.

"Are you sure you want me to read this book? I didn't read it till I was in my late teens it's a romance"

"I know Mum that's why I want you to read it, so I know how to look out for my true love!"

Well you couldn't argue with that so I turned the pages and began reading...

The twins Saturn, left, and Jupiter, right, are growing fast. They look so much alike it's hard to tell who is who, Mars and I also mix up there names. Luckily Saturn hates wearing socks, so we have started putting socks on Jupiter so we don't get them mixed up!

Skye soon had his birthday, we invited a few friends. Aqua even came! She has remarried and has now moved to Sugar Valley so we hope to see more of her, Venus liked having her here to learn more about Pi. It was a good day and we had a lot of fun.

Soon Venus had a someone going to school with her, Skye had no problem making friends and Venus also was becoming more talkative in class. While dropping the kids off I her all the other parents talk about their jobs and how much they have achieved. It makes me upset, all I had achieved was my children, I didn't do well at school or collage mostly because I hardly went and I was always drunk from the party the night before in my collage years.

So I woke up and decided I was going to achieve something, I walked up to Mars who was finishing breakfast to go to work.

"Mars I'm going back to school, I want to achieve something"

He was very supportive and it wasn't to long that I was accepted on a course.

The taxi pulled up and everyone was crying, I was crying because they were crying! I was excited though, I was going to school and I was excited, I mean me, Cass was going back to school! I bet Pi would be proud, shocked but proud.

Cassiopeia Wise-Owl Chapter eight

Time sure dose fly, Venus is now nearly three and Skye almost two. Skye is so cute in his little suite and unlike Venus he doesn't scream and try to run away when you dress him, still at least both of them are on solids now. What with the two surprises we need all the milk formula in the house...

The one with Mars is Jupiter and the one I am feeding is Saturn. Yes we are now the proud parents of twin baby girls! The only thing is both girls have a intolerance to dairy and have to have a special formula, the doctors say they might grow out of it but we can't tell yet.

Skye was only six months old when I became very tried and didn't feel right. Unlike my previous pregnancies I wasn't sick and because we weren't trying for a baby I never thought I could be with child, I quick trip to the doctors confirmed that I was. Mars and I were shocked but very happy.

They children were all asleep in Pi's old room, there are four cribs in there now and it's getting quiet full. Mars says maybe we should move but I don't want to and we won't be able to afford a house just yet, we have been arguing a lot about it.

"Cass you know you don't want to move?"

"Yes?"

If he has brought a house or flat without telling me he defiantly in the dog house!

"I have a surprise"

He took me down the stairs, you see our flat covers the whole of the converted loft and then down stairs in the living room you have a hallway with two flats and then more stairs to another two flats before going down more stairs to the garages and the exit. He stopped at the end of the hallway just bellow of our flat, one door behind me another behind Mars.

"Well where are we?" he asked,

"Outside Old Mrs Wright's flat and the newlyweds' flat"

"Wrong"

He opened the door to the flat that the newlyweds' own and gestured for me to walk in.

The flat was bare and dark as if there was no one living in there. What happened to the young couple, newlyweds, who Pi helped move in five years back? As if seeing my confusion Mars coughed,

"The previous couple have moved out, the husband had inherited a house somewhere"

"So what has that got to do with us?"

"I brought this flat, so the children can have a bedroom each"

The big space we stood in which was the kitchen/living/dinning room I could easily picture as a playroom, one door lead on to a bathroom and the other two empty rooms I could see as a bedrooms. One for the girls and one for Skye, I smiled everything was pretty good.

A year later... 

"Being called Venus is pretty cool I think"

It was September and school loomed for my little girl now, she was four at the moment but turned five in the school term so school was where she was heading. First she had moaned about the uniform and now she was worried what people would think of her name.

"Mum you have to think it's cool you chose to call me that"

I put Saturn in her crib and turned round watching Venus play with Skye, I yawned and prayed that tonight I wouldn't be woken up at three in the morning again.

"Come on Venus you will be fine now let be put Skye to bed"

She got up but with a confused look on her face,

"Mum, what if people think I'm adopted"

"Why would they think that?"

"Well you have white/grey hair, Dad and my siblings have pink hair and I have peachy coloured hair"

I sighed, she would need to eventually.

"Honey, you have peachy hair because you have a different Dad to the others"

"What do you mean?"

"Well I fell pregnant with my best friend Pi but I realised I didn't want to be with him as he was just my friend and then I met Mars and we got married"

She simply said "Oh" and left.

I told Mars to talk to her,

"Hey Venus, Mum said she told you about Pi"

she nodded,

"Listen I don't want to interrupt your game but we need to talk, you see when I met your Mum you were in her tummy and even though you weren't mine and I hadn't even met you yet I knew I was going to love you and look after you when Pi couldn't"

"Mum says Pi is dead"

"He is honey but we sounded like a great guy and I promised him when I spoke to him on the phone once I would look after you as if I was your real dad"

Mars' speech nearly had me in tears especially when Venus got up and hugged Mars.

"I love you Dad"

"I love you too Venus"

Once again Mars and I were in the nursery at three in the morning when they were settled we looked at our little darlings.

"You know what they are the cutest"

"your pretty cute to and the way you were with Venus yesterday was brilliant"

Mars smiled and locked me in a embrace

"you know Cass five kids sounds nice"

Cassiopeia Wise-Owl Chapter seven

"It's your due date tomorrow honey"

"Yeah...it is"

It had been a long pregnancy and I couldn't wait for it to be over. Mars couldn't wait to hold his own child, not that he didn't love Venus but well the love for your own flesh and blood is different I guess. 

I was also more nervous as I had decided to have a home birth and not go to hospital. Mars said I was crazy but I really want to give it ago, I like trying new things. It all started to dawn on me that I was going to give birth soon I was more scared now then I was with Venus.

I got up to get a glass of water and Mars held me and wrapped his arms around me.

"Hey you'll be fine if you did it once you can do it again right?"

I sighed, he was right I've done it before I can do it again. But, what if I lose the baby? What if my behaviour at the start of the pregnancy has hurt the baby? This was my first baby with my husband and what if I have hurt it some way?

Tomorrow came quickly, butterflies flew in my stomach and I got a shivers up my spine. I realised that I wasn't scared but excited and impatient. I got up and had a good, long shower I would of killed for a bubble bath but we only have a shower.

I couldn't wait to stop waddling around in trainers and to finally put on my heels, I love my heels. My heels aren't little, small heels there HEELS big, scary high heels. I know that people say they are bad for me but I just love them!

I did the washing up and while I did I remembered Venus' birth and practised my breathing for the birth. While I finished the last plate I got funny little pains in my stomach, I reached for my phone and called my midwife to come over.

"Hello Cass, how are you, is the baby willing to come out now?"

"Yes, I think so thank you for coming"

"Not at all, home births can be a bit strange at first but hopefully being in your home will make you more relaxed and less stressed"

I let the midwife inside and not I moment to soon my contractions started and I doubled over in pain. I went to the bedroom and started labour.

Mars was a bit out of his comfort zone. He said he would stay but then he turned green and I told him to wait outside. He agreed and left and knowing him covered his ears from my screaming.

When I gave birth I wrapped my little baby up and walked outside, Mars was lying on the sofa.

"Mars, meet our little lad"

"What are you going to call him?"

"I don't know can we talk about it tomorrow I am super tired"

I left the baby to be smothered with love by his Daddy and as soon as my head hit the pillow I fell asleep. Giving birth was exhausting!

When I woke up Mars called me over for a cuddle, I was wide awake now.

"Cass how about we call him Skye?"

"I would love that"

Cassiopeia Wise-Owl Chapter six

My life was a mess, my best friend the father of my baby was dead. I can't eat and what I do eat just came back up and I cry and cry. Pi had fallen while climbing up some ladders and now he was gone.

At first I though it would be alright. Venus will grow up knowing about Pi as I will never forget him and will love her so much. I turned all my grief into love and affection for Venus.

Mars would be a great father figure to her I know and he did a great job of looking after her when I went to China to help Aqua. Poor thing, we never got on but the death of Pi has really brought us together we now know that we were both and equally important to him.

When I came back from my trip I threw my self into getting some bar work and learning to mix and create the drinks the bar wanted me to make. But, I soon realised that the grief soon caught up with me...

I'm now sobbing all the time, being sick from crying too much and not eating properly. Sometimes Mars would have to watch me to make sure I ate, I just couldn't get over losing Pi.

Then I found out I was pregnant. Mars was over the moon and I was happy too...for I while. But it didn't take long for me to get depressed and grief stricken over Pi again.

So now I have ruined my marriage. Mars told me to sit down he looks angry and upset and I know it's over. Why Pi why did you go?

"Cass I love you but you aren't looking after yourself or the baby...I think you need some help, losing Pi must of been really hard on you. Talk to someone please"

I am so relived he isn't ending it with me but I didn't like the idea of talking to some stranger. I knew he was right though I needed to get my act together for Mars, Venus, the baby and for me.

So I started swimming, good for the baby and good for me and also they have a shallow kiddie pool that Venus likes paddling in. We spend most days at the pool now especially as summer is here, we have picnics and can have a lovely time together as a family.

Then for my me time I go to the gym and take classes like aerobics, yoga and dance. I have even gone on date nights with Mars, started helping out at the community gardens and have gone all organic to give my self a healthy life.

Even though I felt a thousand times better Mars still thought it would be good for me to talk to someone, so I booked an appointment to see someone. She was very good and extremely nice, she said what I had done so far was good and she's glad I took those steps.

After a few more secessions she said that I no longer needed to see her. I will always miss Pi but I know that he would want me to be happy and healthy. I felt so good and alive, I couldn't wait to tell Mars.

"Mars I'm so, so sorry for being not the Cass you know for those months"

"It's ok, you went through a lot"

"And I put you two through a lot and I want to thank you for being there"

I took Venus off him and held her close.

"Venus your daddy loves you very much and he would of thought you were a star and I will always protect you and so will Mars"